I follow my Tulley Toes, leaving the watch and my maps behind. This typically leads me to turning lots and lots of corners during a run. I like corners, I never know what’s around the bend…..just like life and I like life.
I feel like the last two years of my life have led me to corners time and time again. It’s like I see that sign that warns of “blind spots” at each one…….I hold my breathe, turn, and keep going. It’s not in me to turn around, stop, or not keep going…..so I do what I do……I run on.
I like the fact that I may be able to plan my mileage, my pace, or general direction…..right up until I turn that corner. That’s when my control, maybe for just a moment, but is lost. I’m left to be exposed, vulnerable, at the mercy of the elements, and the running Gods. I brace as I come up to a corner, maybe even hold my breathe, but go on, pushing through, because if I’ve learned anything; its that I have no control often of anything other than how I respond. And I want to respond in a way in which I would want my friends to respond, have my daughter respond, and those involved in my life to be proud.
Sometimes turning a corner gives me the downhill reprieve I’ve been yearning for….sometimes the hill I want to “billy-goat” up, the wind at my back, or the wind pushing me backwards if I don’t press on…..
And so I take on the corners. The ones where I turn and bump smack dab into something, fall, and have to get myself back up. Sometimes my falls are no big deals…..sometimes my falls are really big deals and when I’m flat on my ass I just cry until I can’t cry anymore, but I still get up…..because that’s what I do. I’m a lot of things but a quitter is not one of them.
I’ve turned corners, and to no one who knows me’s surprise I get lost…..but I again keep going and I eventually get found, or find myself. Sometimes the latter is the better.
Sometimes I hate the corners. I don’t always like change. Sometimes running with the wind is just easier……but I know it doesn’t last. Friends seem to go, family pushes buttons only family can, and I sometimes getting lost is scary……….
But in the end, there are corners and to avoid them is to avoid the potential best part of the run. And so I brace, take a breathe, and turn the corner…………………
Groovy Girls Go…….And Turn Corners